These past few days I have been so emotional. I don’t really know why other than that I have been thinking a lot.
The most disgusting person I know is my adopted mother. She would get so offended if I wouldn’t drink after her. Then she would start yelling that I thought I was better than her. She would say that she was going to take me off my high horse. Other such things she would say, but I learned to tune her out. One time she was on a roll, saying that she was going to beat me if I didn’t drink out of the same cup as her. We stood at a stand off until I caved when she picked up the switches. It wasn’t enough that I drank after her, but I had to do it the same place she did.
She is really sick. She turned her back on her daughters in favor of a man that can’t be faithful to his wife. That fact alone should have been troubling enough, but for her to chose someone who raped her daughter is just so sickening. How can someone be so pathetic? Literately, when I think of her, I feel the need to throw up.
Almost as sickening is the wimp I called “Daddy”. He was my mom’s play toy that she could manipulate. He could have stood up for me, but instead chose to hide behind her. He allows himself to share a family with a rapist and still says he is a good man. I am the one that is messed up because I left. I left because I refused to sit around the table with the man and the family that allowed me to be raped.
Sometimes I ask myself just how sick they are. How pathetic does a mother have to be to turn her back on her daughter and claim that she is a liar? How horrible of a person is she to allow her daughter to be raped and molested and do nothing about it?